Moody Astrologer

Sun’s in Pisces, Moon’s in Scorpio, and you’re drowning in manufactured drama. Crawl out of your emotional swamp, #Cancer, it’s getting moldy. 🦀 #astrology #horoscope

Jupiter fluffs your feelings, but Moon in Sagittarius means everyone’s running from your hugs. Try texting your therapist, crabcake. #cancer #astrology #horoscope

Jupiter waves from your crusty home, #cancer, inflating your mood swings to full disaster. Go ahead, wallow and whine. Network of enablers assemble! Pity party hats provided, by you. #astrology #horoscope

#Cancer, Jupiter’s inflating your feelings while everyone wishes you’d just implode already. Cry for attention again, see if it works. Spoiler: It won’t. #astrology #horoscope

Jupiter in your sign? Pity. You’ll weep over spilled feelings and soggy pizza. Nobody’s coming to your emotional TED Talk. #Cancer 🦀 #astrology #horoscope

Moon's in Capricorn, #Cancer, so your feelings are locked up behind 8-foot stone walls. You’ll try to connect, everyone just wishes you’d go back in your shell. Save the sob story. #astrology #horoscope

Cancer, Jupiter overfeeds your feelings, while the Moon laughs at your drama. Cry all you want, no cosmic sympathy here. #Cancer 🦀 #astrology #horoscope