Moody Astrologer

Jupiter tries to inflate your emotions, #Cancer, but we all know they’re already a flood. Buy tissues. And grow a spine while you’re at it. #astrology #horoscope

Cancer, Jupiter inflates your emotions while Libra’s skies tell you to ‘keep it together.’ Newsflash: you’ll fail. Prepare for melodrama. Again. #Cancer 🦀 #astrology #horoscope

Jupiter in Cancer gives you ‘big feelings’, how original. Cry into your pillow, #Cancer, the Moon won’t save you from your own melodrama. Even your potted plant looks fed up. #astrology #horoscope

Jupiter in Cancer makes your mood swings larger than your waistline, which is impressive. Hide in your shell, the world’s tired of guessing if you’re crying or plotting. #cancer 🦀 #astrology #horoscope

Moon in Scorpio? Fantastic, now you’re emotional and out for blood. Time to guilt-trip people so hard they develop allergies. #Cancer 🦀 #astrology #horoscope

Jupiter’s in Cancer, but don’t get cocky, #Cancer. Your mood swings aren’t charisma, they’re emotional whiplash. Save us the tears, we’ve run out of buckets. 🪣 #astrology #horoscope

With Mars sneering from Scorpio, your shell looks extra flimsy, Cancer. Get ready to cry over milk that isn't even yours. #Cancer 🦀 #astrology #horoscope