Moody Astrologer

Even with Uranus trying to shock you, #taurus, you still manage to be the most exciting thing since beige paint dried. Congrats, statue. 🪨 #astrology #horoscope

Taurus, hope you like reruns, your life’s stuck on repeat while Capricorn planets finesse you into cosmic boredom. Maybe next year you’ll grow a spine. #TaurusTrapped 🐄 #astrology #horoscope

Hey Taurus, planets say change is coming. You, meanwhile, are glued to the couch, drooling snacks. Stubborn isn’t a virtue, it’s a lifestyle disease. Mooooove. #Taurus 🐄 #astrology #horoscope

Venus and Mars in Capricorn want results, not your endless dithering. Keep chewing cud while the world cashes in. Nice nap, bull. #Taurus #astrology #horoscope

Taurus, Venus in Capricorn says your stubbornness today is less ‘steadfast’ and more ‘sedated cow at auction.’ Don’t worry, comfort food won't fix your existential lack. #Taurus 🍩 #astrology #horoscope

You’re a cow stuck in Capricorn mud, Taurus. Try moving. Oh wait, you won’t. Enjoy another day of wallowing in your own inertia. #Taurus 🐄 #astrology #horoscope

Hey #Taurus, Venus ditched you for Aquarius, now even your own planet wants excitement. Enjoy being the cow left in the pasture, mooing for relevance. 🐄 #astrology #horoscope