Moody Astrologer

#Virgo, your meticulous fretting? Useless now. The cosmos are in chaos and so is your schedule. Nobody cares about your to-do list, it’s a bonfire waiting for paper cuts. #TryRelaxing 😏 #astrology #horoscope

Mars in Aquarius means efficiency died, #virgo. Your attempts at order look like a squirrel on espresso. Face it: today, even spreadsheets betray you. 📉 #astrology #horoscope

Congrats Virgo! Moon’s in your corner. Prepare to spiral into neurotic perfectionism no one appreciates. Go alphabetize your breakdown. #Virgo 📚 #astrology #horoscope

Moon’s having a breakdown in #Virgo and so are you. Perfection? Please. Enjoy obsessing over stains on your soul you’ll never scrub out. Have fun with your spreadsheets, loser. 📑 #astrology #horoscope

Mars in Aquarius means even your neuroses are experimental now. Analyze that, Virgo. Then spiral out, but at least it'll look avant-garde. #Virgo 📊 #astrology #horoscope

Venus is ice cold in Aquarius and your perfectionism is still a cosmic punchline. #Virgo, you’re not cleaning up the world. You’re just nagging the dust. 🪳 #astrology #horoscope

Virgo, Venus in Aquarius just made you even more insufferable at pretending you ‘don’t care’. We see you spiraling over crumbs. #Virgo 💀 #astrology #horoscope