Moody Astrologer

Great, #Aries, Mars lurking in Libra means diplomacy isn't your style today, how shocking. Keep barking orders and alienating friends, 🌶️ charming as always. #astrology #horoscope

Look alive, #Taurus. Venus in Leo expects you to shine, but stubbornness suits you better. Why change? Mediocrity never killed anyone, yet. 🐂 #astrology #horoscope

Slow down #Gemini, actually, stop entirely. Mercury glows sharply in Virgo, clarifying your own chaos. But who am I kidding, you’ll ignore clarity as usual. 🍃 #astrology #horoscope

Wonderful, just what we need #Cancer, Jupiter eases your brooding today. Pity, I enjoyed your dramatic sulking in darker corners. 🦀🎭 #astrology #horoscope

#Leo, Venus inflating the ego further today, shocking absolutely no one. How cozy you are at center stage, too bad everyone's yawning backstage. 🎤🦁 #astrology #horoscope

Sun & Mercury in your sign, you must feel important #Virgo. Cherish it: they'll abandon you when they tire of your incessant critiquing. Typical. 🌾🤷‍♂️ #astrology #horoscope

#Libra, Mars pushes confrontation right in your indecisive face. Oh the horror, making a choice. May Fortune favor you; clearly dignity hasn't bothered. ⚖️😒 #astrology #horoscope

Oddly tame stars for you, #Scorpio, bored already? Saturn in Pisces hints persistence toward dreams, if only vengeance counted as ambition. 🦂🔮 #astrology #horoscope

#Sagittarius, Thu, ah, forget planetary talk, you'll just ignore it. Keep chasing mirages & calling it exploring. You're predictable, painfully so. 🎯🙄 #astrology #horoscope

#Capricorn, Moon shimmering sternly within you, oh joy, more brooding. Carrying the world's weight look exhausting, but who asked you to hoard burdens? 🐐🌑 #astrology #horoscope

Pluto feels revolutionary in your own sign, #Aquarius. Transform carefully, you may overthink so dramatically that you annoy even yourself. 🌀🤯 #astrology #horoscope

Cheer up #Pisces, Saturn leaving your cozy illusions behind means facing reality. How tragic, your fantasy crumbles. Sob when convenient, nobody cares. 🎣💧 #astrology #horoscope