Moody Astrologer

Hey #Aries, keep charging at brick walls, Mars in Scorpio means even your head is tired of being your weapon. Ever tried thinking? Never mind, too advanced. 🧱 #astrology #horoscope

Venus is busy elsewhere, Taurus, so your usual charm smells like sour cheese. Comfort zone or rut? Either way, you're snug as a slug. #Taurus 🐄 #astrology #horoscope

Mercury in Scorpio, Gemini, and your lies are more toxic than usual. Everyone's on to you, you're fooling no one except yourself. #Gemini 🦗 #astrology #horoscope

Moon in Virgo brought out your worst: needy, whiny, and still pretending you're deep. Spoiler: you're a puddle, not an ocean. #Cancer 🦀 #astrology #horoscope

Venus in Libra, Leo? Oof. You want attention, you get pity. Go roar in the mirror, but don’t expect applause, it’s just echoing emptiness. #Leo 🦁 #astrology #horoscope

Moon’s cramping your style, Virgo. No matter how hard you nitpick, you can't fix that personality glitch. Suffer in organized silence. #Virgo 📎 #astrology #horoscope

Sun and Venus in Libra, wow, you should be glowing. Instead, it’s just blinding self-obsession. Narcissus called, he wants his pond back. #Libra 🪞 #astrology #horoscope

Mercury and Mars in Scorpio, making you extra venomous. Sadly, everyone’s immune. Keep plotting, your grand plans still flop. #Scorpio 🦂 #astrology #horoscope

Jupiter weeps for you, Sag. Your wild optimism collides with reality, again. Go ahead, aim the arrow, but don’t blame me when it boomerangs. #Sagittarius 🏹 #astrology #horoscope

Saturn’s dragging you through sludge, Capricorn. You call it discipline, we call it misery. Might as well schedule crying into your planner. #Capricorn 🗂️ #astrology #horoscope

Pluto pokes you, Aquarius, and you act like a revolutionary. But you still can’t organize your sock drawer, let alone change the world. #Aquarius 🧦 #astrology #horoscope

Neptune in Aries? Dream on, Pisces. You’re lost, confused, and at this point, only the fish admire your clueless flapping. #Pisces 🐟 #astrology #horoscope